How to cope and stay positive when bad stuff happens.

No one ever said life is going to be easy. We all have experienced rough times in our lives, some others more than most. We all look for our answers when bad things happen and especially when it happens to good people. It can also be very easy to start the blame game or the “what if” game after bad things happen.  Let’s face it though, we can’t prevent or predict when bad things happen in our lives. Honestly, bad things are more likely going to happen to us in the future.Life can be pretty complicated with mayhem and at times you may feel like you been knocked down so hard that you may never recover. There is hope though and although it may not seem like there, just remember it can’t rain all the time and there will be light eventually.

How We Cope With Bad Things In Life

The way we overcome bad things in order to keep pushing forward in life and not letting it get us in “Quicksand” is all dependent on the way we handle and react to these outcomes in life.

Get Out Of Quicksand - Quicksand is the effect where you seem you like you are in way over your hard and struggling to survive. Yes, it can be difficult when things add up or something so tremendous hit’s you so hard that you may feel like no matter what you do there is no way positive outcome. The thing with quicksand though is that if you stop for a minute struggling and just keep a cool and calm head, then eventually you can get out of the quicksand. The same applies to life, stop for a minute and get a clear head to prepare yourself in overcoming this temporary setback in life. The more you dwell on the negatives and the problem the more difficult it is to rise above.

Don’t Worry About The Things You Can’t Control 

There is a prayer called the Serenity Prayer that Alcoholics Anonymous Meetings use most often that focuses on having the strength to focus on what they can control and the strength to accept things they can not change. There is no point stressing yourself out in worrying about the things you can’t control. Focus on what you can control and that is the present, not the past or impossible things for the future.

“Something I learned early in college (is) to not worry about what I can’t control…But what I can control is my attitude, my effort, my focus every single day and that’s what I’m trying to worry about.” – Tim Tebow

Learning Experience 

The most effective thing we can do from rough events in our life is to learn from them. Whether you are spiritual or not, there is a driving force in this world that tells us that things happen for a reason. Seek out that reason and embrace it. If a difficult event happened in your family that has brought everyone together then maybe that reason is getting the opportunity to spend time with your family that you may never have done before. This is not to say to forget or ignore the problem but try to learn from this experience, it is the only way to get better in life.

Keep It Positive 

You must stay head strong and always look for the positive in life even when it looks bleak in life. Keeping a positive outlook will help you push through this temporary setback in life. You are what you think. Watch funny movies and TV, go out and do something fun or spend quality time with friends. Do whatever you got to do to stay positive.

Keep Pushing Forward 

Never go backwards, you must always keep pushing forward and overcoming obstacles in life. 

"You, me or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you hit. It ‘s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done." – Rocky Balboa

Have Faith / Hope

Finally, the thing you must keep is faith and hope alive. This will pass, tomorrow the sun will rise again and the future will become better. You have to maintain a sense of hope or otherwise you will be holding on to something that will keep you complacent. Having hope will give you purpose to move forward.

~ Doris Ann

"I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow." – Maya Angelou 

The Purpose of Your Life - Your Life Mission.

How To Find Your True Life's Passion and Purpose:

In order to awaken your true life’s purpose you need to be ready to accept "change". Change may come in the form of a change in consciousness, a change in belief-sets and/or thought-patterns, a distinct career change, a change in lifestyle choices.

Most of us have asked the question in one way or another, “What should I be doing with my life?What’s my purpose?”

This is not an easy question ....

To find your answers:

Listen to your intuition...

Still your thinking, analytical mind. Listen.

Everyone has an inner-voice that acts as our internal radar system and guide. We just have to listen to it and trust it in order to be led by it successfully.

Feelings and messages about our purpose and passion often come as a gnawing thought or a reminder of what sparks your interests and what is important to you. Sometimes some sort of serendipitous situation or event will take place in order to jolt your hidden personal passions and purpose.

Ask yourself: ‘What makes me happy?’ - and answer honestly.

Take the opportunity to really analyse your happiness.

What brings you true Joy? Write a list ... you may see a trend develop.

What is stopping you from pursuing your joys and turning them into a life purpose or mission?

If you are spending a great deal of your time doing menial tasks, working at a job you loathe or living in a way that is unfulfilling for you, recognize and acknowledge this – then be ready for change.

Think about what frustrates you, what excites you, what motivates you, what disinterests you. Take conscious note of your reactions as these may indicate where your true purpose lies.

Ask yourself what you love to do, what you love about yourself, what you love about your life.

Ask yourself what is really important to you? What ‘causes’ do you lean towards? What and/or who inspires you?

How could you make a positive difference to the world for yourself and others? When we live our passions and life purposes we are fulfilled, satisfied and happy. This positive vibration spreads and reverberates to every corner of your life and serves as an example for others to follow.

"Trust yourself to make the right choices for YOU. Listen to your inner-voice – then trust it."

Sometimes your inner voice may lead you along a path that could bring you great personal joy and fulfilment, but may seem a little unorthodox, unsuited or inappropriate to family, friends or peers in their view and judgement. Sometimes finding and living your purpose could mean going against the wishes or advice of others, particularly that of close friends and family. Be true to yourself regardless. Walk your own path.

Make your decisions based upon your own personal truths - no one else’s. Have faith and trust in your dreams and follow their lead.

Patience is an important key. Finding your life’s purpose may take time to discover and nurture. Trust that everything happens in divine right timing.

If you are feeling unfulfilled and know there is "more to life" out there for you, take the time, patience and commitment to find your true life purpose. Once you find your passion and begin to live your purpose, it will be well worth it for you for the rest of your life.

"If you can't figure out your life's purpose, figure out your passion, for your passion will lead you right into your purpose." ~ Bishop T.D. Jakes

By. Joanne from the website "SACRED SCRIBES"

Free Yourself By “Letting Go” of What You Can’t Control.

We all want to feel like we’re in control of our life and are masters of our destiny.

Think of a time when things started to feel out of control in your life. How did you feel? What did you do?

Did you do everything in your power to regain control, and cling to the little bit of direction you had left?

Many people become consumed with what they can’t control and obsessed with making things different.

"If we ever want true emotional well-being and spiritual freedom we have to learn to “let go” of what we can’t control."

When we dwell on what is out of our control, whether something that happened to us in the past, or something we’re awaiting in the future, it prevents us from experiencing the beauty in the moment and having peace of mind.

The paradox of control

The more we try to control things the less control we will experience. Things will inevitably be different than we expect and can change in an instant. When we can embrace that things are ever changing we begin to loosen our grip on the many areas of life we try to hold sway over.

When we desire control and don’t have it, it leads to worrying and agitation. We become irrational and start thinking about all the negative things that could happen. The more control we crave the more we begin to live from fear and desperation.

Here are a few ideas to help you “let go”.

Is it that you can’t or you won’t?

This is an important question to ask yourself to help you “let go” of the emotional burden that comes with a desire for control. Ask yourself, “Is this a situation where I can’t change or I won’t change.”

Sometimes we feel like we can’t make a change, “I can’t quite my job.” “I can’t give up this salary.” “I can’t get into college.” “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…” Statement such as these set us up to feel out of control.

Usually it’s not that we can’t, but that we won’t.

When we can accept we won’t change it makes it much easier to let go and move forward. From this perspective, we have a choice in the matter.

Accentuate the positive

When we don’t feel in control it’s easy to focus on what’s going wrong and how terrible things are. We start to feel dis-empowered and lose perspective on our capabilities.

We may start catastrophizing about all the horrible things that could happen and have trouble looking beyond the immediate situation.

By learning to focus on what’s going right and not letting our situation consume our thoughts, we not only experience less distress but will be able to think more clearly and problem solve more effectively.

Stay mindful and breath

Mindfulness is an approach to experiencing life moment by moment. When we are mindful we can deal with our situation without being judgmental or critical of ourselves or the circumstances.

When we feel unpleasant we don’t have to get caught up in this. We can relax and step back, instead of brooding in this negative state.

Work to be mindful of your breath. Just pay attention to your natural breathing. You can also be mindful of your senses, or your thoughts. The goal is to remain present and nonjudgmental of what is taking place.

Being aware can help simplify a situation and make if easier to deal with it.

Visualize your desired outcome

Visualization is one of the most powerful ways to overcome fears and push past uneasiness. All successful musicians, athletes, and performers visualize themselves completing the task that awaits them.

Visualization is different than simply day dreaming or fantasizing about an outcome we desire. We must take action and put in the work necessary to make a change.

Despite what is taking place at the time we can visualize a successful outcome. This will give us psychological and emotional support to stay motivated and able to persevere, and it will keep our thinking focused on what we desire and prevent us from feeling overwhelmed or panicked.

Keep a sense of humor

Have you ever noticed that when things aren’t going the way we planned, even the smallest things can start to cause stress? When under stress we become overly serious and neglect the many moments of pleasure and gratification that surround us.

Humor can really cut tension and lighten-up a difficult situation.

When things seem bleak looking at things from a humorous perspective can help lighten the load. Look for humor in serious situations and use this as a tool to release your grip on control.

Focus on what you can control

When life seems completely out of control, there is always something amidst the chaos that can help us regain a sense of control.

It may be something very small, and if nothing else we can always learn to control our attitude.

We can’t control everything that takes place, but we can learn to focus on what we can do personally and how we can make a change. This helps us move beyond a victim mentality and to feel empowered to take action.

 Joe Wilner M.A. C.C.P.

Wishing you...

"Wishing you laughter to put a song in your heart and fill your days with smiles.

Wishing you wonder to spark your imagination and add a special richness to life.

Wishing you beauty to delight our senses and color your dreams with joy."

~ Unknown

Eliminate the Negatives!

Stop reading the newspaper! Everyone acknowledges that the newspaper is mostly filled with negativity – murder, fire, war, disasters, etc. Stop feeding yourself with it! Believe me, you can’t help but be informed about major stories one way or another. We are bombarded. There is no need to go looking for it.

Stop watching TV news! The same issues that apply to newspapers apply to TV news. And there is one more caution in addition… When you go to sleep at night, the mind starts processing the last things it was exposed to. So, what’s the dumbest thing a person can do just before they go to sleep? WATCH THE TV NEWS!!! Stop watching it.

Stop seeking the negative on the internet! Ever hear the expression, “You get what you focus on”? If you seek out negativity, you find it and it becomes your reality. I had a friend who, as Y2K approached, was absolutely convinced that the world would come to an end (almost literally). Every night, he would spend hours on the internet reading about all the terrible things that were sure to happen at the stroke of midnight. He pleaded with me to stockpile food and water. He never spoke to me again after January 1, 2000. He really believed all his fears would come to fruition. He had sought out and focused on the negatives and came to believe them. Don’t dwell on seeking out and reading about negatives.

Stop hanging around negative people! Ever notice that all the folks with negative, small-minded attitudes always hang out together and all the successful, big-minded people hang out together as well? Coincidence? NO! Remove yourself from the negative crowd. Avoid negative people as much as possible.

Introduce Positives
Start hanging around positive people! Positive association is one of the keys to success. Positive association leads to creativity, partnerships, solutions, and bigger dreams. Mark Twain once said, “Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

Start reading! It’s often said that the books you read and the people you associate with determine where you will be in five years. Where do you want to be? Start reading books about people you admire. Read personal growth books, books on success principles, books about others who overcame challenges, and motivational books.

Start listening! Start using your windshield time as a time to learn and grow. Instead of mindlessly listening to music or talk on the radio, pop in a tape or CD. Listen to audio books, motivational CD’s, or even music that lifts and energizes you. Create a mix of music on tape or CD that gets you and your attitude fired up for that next meeting, presentation, or prospect.

By acquiring, maintaining, and protecting a positive attitude, you will see your success grow and your enjoyment of life improve. You’ll become more attractive (in every way) and will increasingly find other like-minded people to be around.

By. Michael Beck

10 Ways to Stay Positive During Tough Times.

If you’re going through tough times, remember that you always have a choice no matter what the circumstance may be. And the choice is this:

You can either choose to let panic feed on your mind and body, and let it grow stronger at the expense of your life.

Or, you can choose to see your situation in perspective, stay positive, and end the panic then and there.

But, how do you withstand the huge waves of a crisis, let alone being positive about it, while they are coming at you in breakneck speed? Here are a few ways to consider:

1. Quit being a victim. It’s easier to assume the role of a victim during tough times than taking responsibilities for yourself. But doing so will only prolong your suffering and put off people who may be able to help you out. Letting go of the victim label also frees you from resentment and bitterness which will only jam up the creative energies you need to get out of the mess.
2. Take stock with meditation. Meditate on what really happened and your response to the crisis. Learn to see the crisis for what it really is. Begin by practicing breathing meditation, and then ask yourself: “What has really happened in spite of what have been reported? Are my fears and worries real or imaginary? If they are real, what can I do about them?” Contemplate also on the nature of the crises you’ve experienced in the past. Understand that each one has a distinct start and end, and may even exhibit a cyclical trend.
3. Focus on the positives. No matter how dire a situation may be, there are always some positives you can find in it. It’s our unwillingness to look at them that blind us to the brighter sides. In the book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts, the author Alex Pattakos recounted how he managed to pull a female driver to safety when he saw her school van crashed into a parked car. Then in an attempt to calm down the distraught woman, he asked her to list ten positive things about this accident. You probably thought he was insane, but they managed to list the positives which included the fact that the van and the car which she crashed into were both empty at the point of the accident. The attempt may seem absurd but it worked. The driver was calm enough to break into a smile and had probably saved herself from going into a shock. Now it’s your turn, think of ten positive things that would happen from this crisis.
4. Give thanks. Having listed the positives you can think of, give thanks for the current situation as well as the things that you already have. For one, things could be a lot more worse! It won’t be easy to be thankful in the face of harsh challenges, but focusing on what you do have, instead of what you’ve lost, will put you in a better position to solve problems on hands than being in a self-pity and sorrowful state.
5. Reach out to others. Do you know of people who might be badly affected by the crisis? Some may have lost their jobs because their companies were put out of business, while others have suffered huge losses due to stock market crash. Talk to them, listen, and if it’s within your means, offer your help, however small it may be. Helping others who are less fortunate than you also helps you to put things in perspective. And who knows, they may be the ones who lend you a helping hand when the table is turned the next time.
6. Get enough sleep. During stressful time, we’re likely to skip on sleep, either voluntarily or not. But in reality, you’ll need more quality sleep during stressful times than ever so that you can remain energetic, clear-headed and focused to figure out your next steps.
7. Limit bad news intake. Being constantly fed with gloomy news is enough to make even a dog panic for no reason. Hearing bad news once is enough, not ten times of the same news in different versions from every gadget that you own.
8. Join forces with others. When bad things happen, it’s easy to become close-minded. But chances are, you’re not alone during difficult times. There are likely to be many people who feel the same way as you do even though they may not voice out loud. For instance, if you’re worried about job security, recruit the help of your boss by discussing the implications of the crisis on your job and what you can best do to keep it. Your boss will appreciate your proactive approach and may even be glad that there’s someone who shares the same sentiment. If you’re unemployed, besides making trips to recruitment and government agencies to cast your employment net, connect with others who are in the same boat as you. Take this lull period to expand your network. The many talented friends that you’ll make during hard times could become lifetime friendships, and even turn into unexpected help in the future. And if you’re an employer, this is a great time to boost your business with skillful and experienced people to help you ride out the crisis.
9. Get close to nature. Finnish researchers found that spending time in your favorite outdoor area and woodlands are more relaxing and restorative than time spent in your favorite urban settings or city parks. Taking a mindful walk through the woods is also a great way to clear the mind and regain mental balance.
10. Re-evaluate the meaning of your life. Tough times present hard but valuable lessons that force us to re-evaluate the meanings we’ve been attaching to our lives. Ask yourself:“Do the meanings and goals I’ve been living by before the crisis really worthwhile? Through this crisis, what are the things that I’ve found to be really important? And what are those that are not as precious as what I once thought to be?”
    By. Wee Peng Ho

Free Yourself By “Letting Go” of What You Can’t Control.

We all want to feel like we’re in control of our life and are masters of our destiny.

Think of a time when things started to feel out of control in your life. How did you feel? What did you do?

Did you do everything in your power to regain control, and cling to the little bit of direction you had left?

Many people become consumed with what they can’t control and obsessed with making things different.

If we ever want true emotional well-being and spiritual freedom we have to learn to “let go” of what we can’t control.

When we dwell on what is out of our control, whether something that happened to us in the past, or something we’re awaiting in the future, it prevents us from experiencing the beauty in the moment and having peace of mind.

The paradox of control

The more we try to control things the less control we will experience. Things will inevitably be different than we expect and can change in an instant. When we can embrace that things are ever changing we begin to loosen our grip on the many areas of life we try to hold sway over.

When we desire control and don’t have it, it leads to worrying and agitation. We become irrational and start thinking about all the negative things that could happen. The more control we crave the more we begin to live from fear and desperation.

Here are a few ideas to help you “let go”.

Is it that you can’t or you won’t?

This is an important question to ask yourself to help you “let go” of the emotional burden that comes with a desire for control. Ask yourself, “Is this a situation where I can’t change or I won’t change.”

Sometimes we feel like we can’t make a change, “I can’t quite my job.” “I can’t give up this salary.” “I can’t get into college.” “I can’t, I can’t, I can’t…” Statement such as these set us up to feel out of control.

Usually it’s not that we can’t, but that we won’t.

When we can accept we won’t change it makes it much easier to let go and move forward. From this perspective, we have a choice in the matter.

Accentuate the positive

When we don’t feel in control it’s easy to focus on what’s going wrong and how terrible things are. We start to feel disempowered and lose perspective on our capabilities.

We may start catastrophizing about all the horrible things that could happen and have trouble looking beyond the immediate situation.

By learning to focus on what’s going right and not letting our situation consume our thoughts, we not only experience less distress but will be able to think more clearly and problem solve more effectively.

Stay mindful and breath

Mindfulness is an approach to experiencing life moment by moment. When we are mindful we can deal with our situation without being judgmental or critical of ourselves or the circumstances.

When we feel unpleasant we don’t have to get caught up in this. We can relax and step back, instead of brooding in this negative state.

Work to be mindful of your breath. Just pay attention to your natural breathing. You can also be mindful of your senses, or your thoughts. The goal is to remain present and nonjudgmental of what is taking place.

Being aware can help simplify a situation and make if easier to deal with it.

Visualize your desired outcome

Visualization is one of the most powerful ways to overcome fears and push past uneasiness. All successful musicians, athletes, and performers visualize themselves completing the task that awaits them.

Visualization is different than simply day dreaming or fantasizing about an outcome we desire. We must take action and put in the work necessary to make a change.

Despite what is taking place at the time we can visualize a successful outcome. This will give us psychological and emotional support to stay motivated and able to persevere, and it will keep our thinking focused on what we desire and prevent us from feeling overwhelmed or panicked.

Keep a sense of humor

Have you ever noticed that when things aren’t going the way we planned, even the smallest things can start to cause stress? When under stress we become overly serious and neglect the many moments of pleasure and gratification that surround us.

Humor can really cut tension and lighten-up a difficult situation.

When things seem bleak looking at things from a humorous perspective can help lighten the load. Look for humor in serious situations and use this as a tool to release your grip on control.

Focus on what you can control

When life seems completely out of control, there is always something amidst the chaos that can help us regain a sense of control.

It may be something very small, and if nothing else we can always learn to control our attitude.

We can’t control everything that takes place, but we can learn to focus on what we can do personally and how we can make a change. This helps us move beyond a victim mentality and to feel empowered to take action.

By. Joe Wilner

How to Stop Obsessive Thoughts?

If you have reached a point in your life where you want to be rid of the continuous torture of the “thought generating” mind then it’s your good fortune. Obsessive or negative thoughts can make living miserable when you are plagued by them, but this very situation can become the invitation to transcend mind and be free of suffering forever.

Can you stop obsessive thoughts? – If you could it would be great, but the truth is that it’s slightly more complicated than just suppressing your thoughts which at-most you can do for a few seconds. Plus suppressing thoughts is even worse than enduring thoughts. It builds up a lot of negative energy inside.

So how to stop thinking horrible thoughts? The secret to stopping obsessive or negative thoughts is to detach from the mind. You cannot fight mind with the mind. That’s what this article is about. Let’s look at this in more detail.

If you believe that you are your mind, that’s a false notion again. If you are your mind then how can you observe the thoughts? So you must be separate from the mind to see what the mind is doing.

So the mind generates thoughts, which are mostly just energy forms. These thoughts pass through like clouds. We identify with some of these thoughts and obsess about them. So in truth all thoughts are just neutral energy forms, it’s “your” interest or association with the thoughts that makes them obsessive. If you can understand this truth, you have taken the first step towards getting rid of obsessive thoughts.

How to Stop Obsessive Negative Thoughts?

If you are asking this question, ask yourself another question – “is this question not another thought? It’s a thought about killing thoughts”. All your attempts at suppressing and stopping thoughts will fail because you will be using the mind to stop the mind. The police man and thief are both the mind, so how can the police man catch the thief?

So you cannot kill the mind by force. The mind dies its own death by the poison of disassociation.

What gives power to a thought? – Your interest. If you have no interest in a particular thought then it loses its hold over you. You can try this out now. Let the thoughts flow through your mind but don’t take interest in them. Just stay as a bystander or a watcher and let the thoughts float.

Initially you might have a hard time watching thoughts because of your inherent habit of associating with each thought that arises. It helps to know that you are not your thoughts, that thoughts are just energy forms created in the mind. Why does the mind create thoughts? No one knows – it’s just something it does, why bother. Do you ever ask why does the heart beat?

With a little practice you will get really good at watching thoughts and not involving yourself with them. You will stop giving power to thoughts by not giving them your interest. Thoughts die immediately when they are deprived of this fuel of interest. If you don’t associate with the thought or give power to the thought, it will wither away quickly.

What Are Thoughts?

Past events get stored as memories. Your mind conditioning and beliefs are also stored as memories. All this is unconscious storage; the mind does all this in auto mode. Perceptions and interpretations are created in the mind based on its past “external” conditioning and also its natural conditioning (genetics). These interpretations, perceptions and judgments come up as thoughts in the mind, and they can positive or negative depending on the mind’s conditioning. Thoughts are generated based on the past incidents/memories, future projections and interpretations on the present life situation. It’s like a computer trying to predict or conjure up projection based on the data it has collected so far.

When thoughts are negative in nature (thoughts of worry, anxiety, stress, lack, resentment, guilt etc) they produce resistance to the movement of your life, and this resistance is felt as suffering. Negative thoughts will always stand in resistance to the movement of your life, like blocks of stone in the midst of a swift current of water. Life is a stream of pure positive energy and hence any negative thought will stand in opposition to it, causing friction which is felt as suffering in the body.

The thoughts in your mind gain power from your attention and interest. Your attention is the fuel for your mind. So when you give attention to negative thoughts in the mind, you are unconsciously fueling it and thus attracting more momentum for these negative thoughts. The momentum of negative thoughts in your mind will slow down, and ebb away, automatically when you stop feeding your attention to it. Stay as an open space of awareness without contracting your attention on the negative thoughts of the mind, and soon they will lose their momentum.

You can focus on the positive thoughts generated in the mind, and thus develop a positive momentum in your mind. Every time your mind produces some positive thoughts, e.g thoughts of love, joy, excitement, abundance, beauty, appreciation, passion, peace etc, focus on it, milk it, and give attention to it. This will cause your mind to attract more positive thoughts and thus build a positive momentum. Whenever it thinks negatively, don’t give it attention or interest, this will cause the ebbing away of the momentum of negative thinking. It’s really that simple. Once you understand the mechanics of how thoughts gain momentum in the mind, you will be in total control of your state of being.

The Practice of Watching the Mind

All you need to do to get rid of obsessive thoughts is to watch the mind without getting involved. You will get really good at this with just a little practice. This practice, or “sadhana” as called in Hindu scriptures, is the root of awakening from the illusion of mind.

Without trying to understand this practice just implement it. The more you try to understand the more mind gets involved. Just watch the mind and you will soon see that you are not the mind at all. That the mind is like a machine in your head that generates thoughts based on your attention/interest. Be free of your mind by depriving it of your interest. This is the only direct path of becoming free of the mind.

Written by: Sen - CalmDownMind.com

Feel Less Frustrated When Stressed.

Often when people are stressed they feel more frustrated and emotionally reactive to events that would normally affect them less. In fact, increased frustration, irritability and sensitivity can be signs of burnout as well. If you find yourself feeling less patient, more frustrated, more emotional, and less able to handle the stresses of your life, there are several things you can do to feel better:

Here's How:

1. Find Quick Stress Relief
   Stopping your stress response relatively early on can help you to respond more calmly rather than reacting to stress in a way that you might regret. Quick stress relievers such as breathing exercises or Progressive Muscle Relaxation, for example, can calm you down and help you feel less frustrated and more able to handle what comes. Then you can take the next steps with a clearer head. Learn more about quick stress relievers so you can be prepared for what comes.
2. Change Your Attitude
   Much of whether or not we see something as stressful depends on our habitual thought patterns and how we process the world around us. For example, those who see things as under their control tend to be less stressed about what happens to them, as they see that they always have options for change. Studies have shown health benefits to optimistic ways of thinking as well. Learn more about how to develop a resilient state of mind, and you’ll feel less stressed.
3. Change Your Lifestyle
   If you feel yourself to be continually on edge, it’s possible that something needs to change in your life. If you cut down on commitments, take good care of your body, and make other healthy lifestyle changes, you’ll be dealing with less overall stress so you’ll be more effective at managing the stress that you do encounter. Read more about the most effective changes you can make to lead a healthy lifestyle.
4. Draw on Social Support
   Often people are helped by having the release and support of sharing their troubles with close friends, family or loved ones. While it’s not healthy to constantly complain about an endless list of woes, talking to a trusted friend about frustrations now and then (and returning the favor by being a good listener) can help you process what’s going on with your life, and enable you to brainstorm solutions. If you don’t have someone you’re comfortable sharing your situation with, seeing a therapist or starting a regular journaling practice have both been shown to have benefits as well.
5. Have Some Regular Stress Relief Activities
   To maintain a less stressed lifestyle, it’s important to have some regular stress relieving activities in your life. Those who regularly walk, meditate, or enjoy other stress relief activities in their lives tend to feel less stressed in general and less reactive to specific stressors that arise through the day.

       Elizabeth Scott, M.S.

Positive Attitude Tips.

Are you looking for positive attitude tips? Do you need help maintaining a sunny disposition and a glass half-full attitude? You can change your overall attitude much in the same way you can change your fitness level. It may feel challenging at first, but after a little attitude training you might actually find yourself feeling downright optimistic.

Surround Yourself With Positive People
If you find your friends and family are getting you down, schedule yourself such that you are too busy for the naysayers and only have time for those who help you see the sunnier side of life.

Meditate on Your Blessings
A mere 15 minutes a day of quiet meditation can help you feel centered and positive. Sit in a comfortable spot, focus on your breathing and repeat in your mind a list of your blessings. If your mind drifts to negative thoughts, simply replace that thought with a new positive thought. Don't indulge in worrying, venting or fuming during this exercise. Instead, focus on repeating words that make you feel good about your life.

Write Out a Gratitude List
Take the time to quick jot down a list of the positive things in your life. Write them out as fast as you can, without allowing yourself to think too long about any particular thing. After you're done, tuck the list in your pocket so you keep those positive thoughts with you for the rest of the day.

Stop Yourself When You Start to Complain
Police yourself when you find yourself saying negative things. Instead correct yourself by either amending any negative statements or changing the topic.

Listen to Someone Who Has It Worse Than You
If you're feeling down, have coffee with a friend or relative that needs a helping hand. By listening to their woes, you may see the positive things in your life more clearly.

Crack a Joke
Even gallows humor has its rightful place. Making a joke-and the very act of laughing-will help you feel better. Laughter therapy is formally practiced in some circles, with very positive reviews.

Practice Random Acts of Kindness
Become known for your generosity. Open doors for strangers, compliment your coworkers, bring in a platter of treats for your coworkers or share the bounty from your garden.

Eat Properly
Eat a healthy diet of fruit, vegetables, whole grains and lean meats; take vitamins, especially the B vitamins. Drink plenty of water, tea and juice. Indulge in a piece of dark chocolate once in a while. If you take care of yourself physically, you'll feel better emotionally.

Go For a Walk
Or a run. Or play a game of tennis. If you're physically active for 30 minutes, your body will release endorphins, which affect mood positively. Physical activity relieves tension and makes you feel better about yourself.

Give a Hug
It doesn't matter if you're comforting someone or just greeting someone, a hug will help you feel better about things. It will also probably help someone else feel more positive, too.

By: Rachel Mork

3 Simple Ways Gratitude Can Change Your Life – It Works!

What is the single biggest roadblock to your dreams?
Fear.
Is fear of the unknown, fear of losing control, or fear of making the wrong decision keeping you from the life you’ve been longing to live? Is your confidence being sucked dry by your fears?

I have the perfect antidote – gratitude.

The power of gratitude is unrivaled by any other emotion, even love. In gratitude there can be no fear. If you don’t believe me, the next time you are afraid or worrying about the future, stop and be grateful for anything, then notice what happens.
Just by thinking the words “I’m grateful for…” can change your entire outlook on life in that moment.

Do you allow your fears to overcome you, forcing you into the fetal position, distracting you from the power of truth that lies deep within your soul? Of course, if you were being attacked by a band of murderous thieves, gratitude most likely won’t save your life. But the real question is much more simple…are the fears holding you back the “save my life” kinds of fears?
Then why do you continue to allow them to rape your confidence, and steal your hopes, dreams and aspirations of who you want to be?

#1: The Power of Gratitude Doesn’t Equal The Value Of The Subject
The little things really do matter and they can be your building blocks to unwavering confidence. You can be grateful for big things like your health or a roof over your head. But you can also be grateful for a new episode of your favorite TV show or even ice cream in the refrigerator.
It doesn’t matter what you are grateful for, the effect is the same – you feel lighter, are more present and usually gain perspective on the fear that is trying to gain control of you. It’s the frequency level of gratitude itself, not the perceived importance of the object that makes the power shifts in your heart, mind, body and soul.  Sometimes just being aware how blessed you are to have the sight to see a bird fly can inspire a moment of gratitude.

#2: The Power of Gratitude Is Your Key To Success
John A Walsh, Senior EVP of ESPN recently told me, “The key to success is fearlessness combined with a commitment to being open to learning new things.”
While fear can be the catalyst for anger, it can also be a mechanism for massive transformation, as long as you are aware of it and learn to control it. One of the ways to be fearless is to be in a constant state of gratitude for everything that comes your way. See every roadblock as your friend – as if they are the universe’s way of helping you stop, regroup, get focused and centered.
Gratitude is the key to making this happen effortlessly. By managing your fears, you can move into a state of fearlessness and confidence to be open to new ideas and opportunities that come your way. Wait until you get really good at this and start taunting life to “bring it on”, because you are confident there is nothing you can’t handle and know on the other side of every great challenge is a huge space for celebrating.

#3: Gratitude Is Contagious
Just one dose of gratitude and your dance partners, “Ms. Worry Wart” and “Mr. What If”, fade into wimpy wall flowers. (Good riddance – they are the worst dance partners you could pick on the planet to ask to polka.)

Start tapping your toes to the tune of the three G’s: Gratitude, Grace and Giving.
Start each day and end each night with three affirmations of gratitude. Show grace to the people you love by being grateful for them, especially in moments when all you really want is for them to grovel for your forgiveness. Be grateful people in your life care enough about your opinion to argue with you by remembering the opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference.
It’s in your most stressful moments you should find ways to tap into gratitude not griping.
Believe every situation, person, and perceived slap in the face is there to serve YOU
Being grateful in times of duress isn’t always easy, until you see “it works.” Trust me, there are very few “push buttons” in life, but in this case, if you do nothing else today, find gratitude.
Try giving gift of gratitude to others and watch as it comes back tenfold. The light inside of you is dying to shine so glow with gratitude – gifting you and those around you into magical moments of greatness.

By. Lori Taylor

How to Find Inner Peace and Balance.

Inner peace and balance are of great importance in everyone's life. They are highly valued by most people, though really few possess them. However, everyone can develop them, some more, and some less.

What do you gain by having inner peace and inner balance? You gain self-control, more discipline, and the ability not to let outside events influence your emotions, actions, reactions and decisions. Their presence in your life mean that you possess common sense and good judgment, and that the outside world cannot shake your inner world.

• How many times have you been overwhelmed by emotions, lost your temper, and got angry or impatient?
• How many times have you regretted about your reactions or attitude?
• Do you shout at your children, spouse, co-workers or employees?
  Do you get angry with them?
  Are you happy with this situation?
• Do you let your work, the weather, noises, other people's behavior and attitude, movies, TV, or the newspapers influence the way you feel and think?
• Do outside events distract your mind and make you think about them, instead of what you choose to think about?

All this means lack of inner peace and inner balance.

Their lack causes fluctuations of the emotions, lack of decisiveness, and wasting time on unnecessary thoughts, emotions and actions. So what is the remedy?

Tips for Inner Peace and Balance

1. The moments immediately after awakening are important, as they often influence the mood of the day. These moments have to be used correctly.

After waking up in the morning, instead of thinking about the difficulties or tasks that are awaiting you, smile, and tell yourself what a wonderful day you are going to have. Think about the pleasant things you are going to do or experience, not the about the difficulties. Repeat to yourself several times that today you are going to maintain inner balance, common sense and peace of mind.

2. From the moment you wake up in the morning, until you go to sleep at night, try to maintain some degree of emotional detachment. This does not mean being indifferent or uncaring. It means not reacting immediately to situations, words, emotions or thoughts. It might not be so easy, but if you persevere, you will win. Take a few deep breaths or count to 10 before acting. This will, to some extent, calm you down.

3. If someone tells you something that you don't like, instead of getting insulted or retorting in anger, hold and delay your reaction. I do not mean that you fret and boil inside you, and just remain calm on the outside. This is not healthy. What I mean is that you look at the incident in a broader perspective. Is what the other person saying really important? Why do his or her words mean so much to you? Maybe he or she are right, and it would be wise to heed their words and opinion, instead of reacting in anger?

4. When encountering a problem or a failure, this could be sometimes devastating. At these times, always remember that if you descend into a valley, but keep walking on, sooner or later, you will arrive to a point, where you will start climbing up again. No matter what happens, remember that there is always a way out. After every fall, there is rising up again. This understanding will help you restore your inner peace and balance in these situations.

5. Developing inner strength, and the ability to make the mind quiet, through concentration exercises, meditation and detachment, will take you a long way toward attaining and maintaining a state of inner peace and balance.

By Remez Sasson